Kim Jong-un wins statesman award, rumours of dictatorship are ‘western notion’

North Korea’s great leader, Kim Jong-un has won a “global statesman award” as the United Nations reports some 10.2 million North Koreans are currently facing famine.

Kim Jong Un

His winning had nothing to do with anti-aircraft guns or dogs.

Rachmawati Soekarnoputri, the daughter of Indonesia’s first president Soekarno, awarded Kim with the “Soekarno Award” last Sunday. In case your wondering, yes he humbly named the award after himself. When bestowing the honour, Rachmawati qualified it, saying silly talk of a North Korean dictatorship is merely a “western notion”.

“We will give the award to President Kim Jong Un because he has been consistent in carrying out the ideals of the great leader Kim Il Sung, which is to fight imperialism. So this will be a sequel, where we give the award to Kim Jong Un for his persistence in fighting neo-colonialism”

While there have been rumours of Kim Jong-un executing people with anti-anticraft guns, Soekarno himself doesn’t have a much better reputation with political prisoners, curbs on freedom of expression and being a bit of a c-bomb on the international stage.

Kim can be proud that he now brushes shoulders with Mahatma Gandhi, who received the award previously.

North Korea, best Korea.