With their latest machine-learning, heuristic classification and knowledge graph scraping technology, Google has decided hiccups are best cured with a rectal massage.
At the time of writing, if you try searching Google on how to stop hiccups it will suggest:
- Drink Water Plugged Ears. Drink an entire glass of water with a straw and block both of your ears, or get a friend to do it while you drink. …
- Pull Your Tongue Out. Yes, this may be considered rude to do in public, but pulling out your tongue helps to stop those incessant hiccups. …
- Have an Orgasm. …
- Get a Rectal Message.
While we salute Google for its stupendous technical achievements, this does provide some comfort that Super AI and Skynet is possibly still more than a year away.
Story tipped via @chrisgedge